-Chirayu Regmi

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Call me a skeptic, but I do not really see the point of upcoming constitutional assembly election. There are two, valid I think, reasons I dare say that.

Why did last constitutional assembly fail to deliver the much anticipated book of laws, even while its term was extended, four times? Well, they say it was about the ‘type’ of federalism, they could not agree upon- so after a series of disagreements, they finally gave up shamelessly, to appear again to forever forgetful forgiving people of Nepal, each one of them (major parties) hoping maybe, could salvage a majority this time, and make a constitution like they want.

And if we really believed in that, and if were clever enough to conspire to make one party win (but there are oh, so many parties), then this election might fulfill its aspirations. Otherwise, without the major parties (while a major chunk of a major belligerent party remains anti-election) agreeing on a common ground, or at least willing to, this whole election will be a mere fiasco. And what if the parties agree, negotiate and work towards the goal? Then, we simply don’t need the election! Revive the old committee, and publish what is almost drafted already.

When we were young, while playing cards, if none of us had a good set in hands, we used to unanimously agree to a rematch, and each one drawing cards again hoping to get something better this time.

Election costs lots of money- not just government’s. One candidate spends a minimum of 5 million, and one can easily guess what kind of money that is. Huge sums pledged by businessmen, and agents of various sorts, will be thankfully refunded, with hefty interest in terms of undue favors when the bloke makes it to power. It’s a vicious cycle of corruption and crime.

Second reason is more pertinent. We are heading to an election that would dictate ways of our life, without proper preparation. Without discussing the grave issues like Federalism, the prospects of sustainability, the economic viability, the risk of collapse and danger of disintegration, we are upto it, like it is some magic wand that will take all our woes away.  No, Federalism is just a fancy word here, to give people a false sense of achievement.

We have a communist party who looks to secure votes in name of ethnicity, a 180 degrees of deviance from what Marx said in ‘religion is opium of society’, rather juxtaposed to the British ‘divide and rule’. Parties’ manifestos are overburdened with bogus terms, and do not even bear a clear insight of the situation or society, let alone deal with the problems in a sensible manner. Corrupts and incompetents constitute the standing committees. Convicts, murderers and goons are contesting.  Do we really want these people sketch our dreams, design our destiny? We do not yet have the political maturity, in public or the leadership good enough for the purpose. That is why it aborts, maybe for right reasons.

दशैको कोठा

- चिरायु रेग्मी  


‘छिटो छिटो, साइत भै’गो- बा, झट्ट नुहाउनु!’

‘दश बजिगो? टावेल  ल्या त टावेल!’

‘अंकलहरू अझै आएनन? जा अक्षता ल्या, जमरा पनि ल्या    

, मस्तै ल्या’

‘किस्ती का छ? त्यो राम्रो थ्यो नि?’

‘भैगो, भैगो, थालमै ल्या, होइजान्छ’

‘ओहो अङ्कल, सुट नै ढल्काउनु भा? राम्रो छ’

‘बा, छिटो गर्नु न’

‘यो कति राम्री देखिएकी- हाम्री बहिनी’

‘दादा फोटो खिच्नु न’

‘खिच् खिच्, एता पनि खिच्’

‘राम्ररी के! आइज, तँ पनि आइज’   

‘भैगो तिमीहरु अब, तल बस- टिका लगाउने’

‘पूर्व फर्केर बस’

‘लौ, पहिला हाम्रो पालो, तिमीहरु फोटो खिच है’

‘जयन्ति मंगला काली..’

‘लाइट मिलेन.. झ्याल बन्द गर है..’

‘तल राख्ने रुमाल ल्याओ त’

‘खोइ टोपी लाएनस? मेरो लगाउछस? ला’

‘भएन, यसको टाउको ठुलो रैछ’

‘अब बुद्धि धेरै भए पछि…’

‘टिका बसेन, दहि पुगेन, अलि दहि हल के’

‘फेरी लगा जस्तो गर्नुस न, फोटो आएन’


‘आयु द्रोण सुते, सृयम दसरथे..’

‘हात पुछ्ने रुमाल खोइ?’

‘ल ढोग, आज खुट्टामै ढोग।  यो खुट्टामा पनि’


‘ल अब तिमीहरु बस’

‘कतिमा पढ्छ यो कान्छा?’

‘ओइ नानी, राम्ररी बस’

‘अलि उता सर न, मलाई ठाउ नै छैन’

‘प्लस टु’


‘आइ.ए बा, आइ.ए’

‘ल बाबु फ़स्टाएस, राम्रो गरेस’

‘हजुरबाले यसपाली धान फस्टा जस्तै फस्टा भन्नु भा हो?’

‘होइन लाटा, फस्ट भएस भन्नु भा, क्लासमा’

‘बुवा, धेरै नलाउनु है, पुग्यो’

‘होइन सात पटक’

‘आयु द्रोण सुते…’

‘ल दक्षिणा ला’

‘कति भो तेरो?’

‘खोइ, चार सय असि भयो क्या हो’

‘अब मामाघर जानु पर्छ’

‘ए खानेकुरा ल्याओ के’

‘भैगो, जाम’

‘होइन,खाएर जाओ’

‘ए भयो भयो, धेरै हुन्छ’

‘अलि हाल न, अलि हाल’

‘अब सबैको फोटो खिचम’

‘कति पानि पर्या छ’

‘जाम जाम’

‘ल बाई बाई!’


त्यो के मान्छे ?


त्यो के मान्छे जो,

यथास्थितीमै दङ्ग परेर

निर्जीव निर्जीव झैँ

मुर्छित मुर्छित झैँ

र्याल काढेर,

अनि आफ्नै र्यालको कोकुनमा

गुटुमुटि डल्लो परेर,

न्यानो मानेर,

बाहिर निस्किन चाहन्न-

पुतली बनेर, उड्न चाहन्न ।


त्यो सुकेको प्याज जस्तै

चम्किलो आवरणको दम्भमा,

कौसीको एउटा खम्बामा,

वा भान्छाको एउटा कुनामा थन्किरहन्छ,

कहिले भुटिएर, कहिले काँचै

कसैको मुखबाट गन्ध बनेर छुट्छ

र कोठाभरि रन्किरहन्छ -

अमिलो र अप्रिय ।


प्याज फुलेको देखेको छौ?

त्यो फुल्ने प्याज बन तिमी !


बर्षौ बुइगलमा थन्केर पनि

एक रात भिज्न पाएमा,

गमक्क फुलेर प्राण झैँ

मुसु मुसु मुस्काउदै

आकाशतीर टुसाउने

तिमी क्वाँटी बन ।



वर्षातमा रुझ्न जाऊ

माटोभीत्र आफ्नो जरा बुझ्न जाऊ

सके जति फूल, फक्र, फल तिमी -

हुरी आउछ, खुब हल्लाउछ,

असिनाले खुब चुट्छ,

तर नझर, कत्ति नगल तिमी  ।


आकाश छुन्छु जस्तै गरेर उम्र तिमी,

चरा हुन्छु जस्तै गरेर उफ्र तिमी

किनकि जिन्दगि जेनतेन बाँचेर

बुढेसकालमा हृदयघातले

उपलब्धिहीन, असन्तुस्ट

मर्नलाई होइन,

गजब गजबका कुराहरु,

गर्नलाई हो!


Ceiling Fan

Like a ceiling fan

with much movement

and work,

and like almost flying,

but still stuck at one place

of nothingness,

and hopeless emptiness.


Like a old rusty version of the fan,

that makes a rattling metallic sound

like its about dreams of his youth,

languishing over the situation.





Why should you be nice to doctors?


A hi fi patient of political background in a government hospital- met with an apparently minor accident- was lying in a bed allocated for ER staffs doing night duties. Well, the privileged one, I said. He’d already been screened for major injuries (none found) by my subordinate when I arrived, and was surrounded by a couple of ‘well wishers’, and he was talking excitedly to someone on mobile. When I reached to examine him, he gestured like a movie star to wait and let him talk, which would take a while.

 I thought ‘what an ass!’ I went away. I came back later to see the patient- after all, its my job, still thinking ‘what an ass’. Now the number of visitors had remarkably increased, who wouldn’t go away despite being asked to make room for examination. I hurriedly did the needful, my mind wondering and wandering over many things, for stimuli- there was plenty. Later, upon cool reflection I realised I could not see and manage the patient as well as I could have, and it was NOT my fault.    

A medical doctor such as me writing this article makes it look kind of vain, but all I am trying to do is state the matters of fact.

Society has regarded doctors highly since forever. Part of it comes from the noble cause they work for- saving lives, healing disease and making people feel better, a part for the meticulous hardships of the profession and a part, for the long hours they ungrudgingly work for.

But mostly, it is a mere psychology- a belief and hope of patient that this doctor will look after me better if I am nice to him. Since medical care is not a commodity with a ‘quality control’, one has to believe in what comes out of the head of the medic. Even with thousands tests and charts to make a diagnosis, clinical assessment by a doctor is still the core of management. And this, a doctor does by going through huge database he’s created in his head while in medical school and years of practice. He has to do that within the little time frame allotted for consultation. And make a presumptive diagnosis, suggest some tests and with some lab guidance thereby obtained, prescribe a suitable medicine- again analysing the side effects, adverse reactions and compatibility of the drug with this particular person. All that done, while tending to patient, nodding head to attendants and smiling. So you wouldn’t want to bring negative thoughts into head of a doctor and bother him with that while he’s trying to solve your problem- while he has intricate details to think of.

Treating a patient is like taking exams- patient asks questions with signs and symptoms, and we treat with answers. And like we’d prefer to take exams in a comfortable environment as far as possible, with as little noise and as few things to bother, we like to be thinking only about treating the patient while treating the patient. We are humans too, we get angry at harsh words, arrogance bothers us too.  We might not hesitate to mop up a bleeding artery, or dissect a putrefied corpse for autopsy, but an uncomprehending unrelenting mob outside the Emergency room makes us nervous too.  Obviously, it is the patient who has to suffer for the whole drama.

Doctor patient relationship is much like being in love. And you can’t force anyone into loving you, you rather sweet talk them to agreement.

Personally I am, all love towards my patients. I work hard, I study so I can help my patients better. I fight with hospital management to improve things in the hospital. And I do understand patients can’t be sugar candy at the time of accidents, troubles, and disease. But it’s a psychological thing, and a smart thing to do- being nice. 

Obsessive Compulsive Stalker


Obsession is a thought you’d very much like to avoid, but that keeps coming back and lingers. And compulsion is the intense urge to do something about it- in order to ease the tension, mitigate the anxiety. Act being here- the stalking.

And by stalking I mean, stalking over the internet- facebook and twitter accounts, instagram- even little applications like whatsapp and viber- just to check if someone’s logged in!

This someone’s usually the ex. You don’t stalk someone you are just attracted to- not that obstinately, for checking out to qualify ‘staliking’ it should be insane. You should be thinking about this person everyday, and all the time when you are free. Like a constant background music to all your activities, her memory’d screw up your psyche so much. Like first thing in the morning and last thing in the night before you fall asleep. Yes, just like love, not just as good.   

Love is like river. Like a river it is important and provides many essential things to life, and to survival. You may drink on love, catch fishes for food, make it a means of transport or even generate electricity. Or just swim. But when the embankment breaks down, it is flood sweeping away houses, destroying roads and mayhem.

And its after unceremonious break ups you stalk, to analyse, realize, summarize and finally paralyze yourself with the matters-of-fact.

How to overcome this unhappy state of mind and move on?

 Its called Exposure and Response prevention therapy. Let the little triggers- just some sub threshold memories agitate you- but don’t stalk still. And gradually, when you think you are doing better- let the stronger, happier and more intense memories intrude. But don’t stalk still- defeat the urge, don’t surrender to the compulsion and once you stop performing the ‘act’ the thoughts will stop coming and haunting you altogether. Good luck!




Upon dreams and plans

upon reluctance

floating, and just looking at

things, oh so many things I need do.


Like stung by a sea snake

and paralyzed

or merely believing in mind

some sort of that happened

glorifying the misery

clinging onto tragedy

like a licence to do nothing.


I do nothing!

Nothing about my designs

or hopes or wounds,

or even hunger.